Five days in the office makes a shitty week. That has always been my mantra since I started working in the program I am in. I am not office material, at least not without a healthy dose of physical work that involves touching fish on some sort of regular basis. It’s part of the reason that I didn’t want to move up the ladder in any way.
The Peter Principle.
I don’t ever want to be a victim.
Years ago a number of people tried to encourage me to move up the ladder. My response was questioning and their replies were that I was a bit of a disruptor and that I could help change things.
But no one ever really manages to shift the needle far in an organization like this. At best they learn to bend and capitulate to the powers that be in order to get to the next rung. I don’t care about the next rung, I care about the rung that I was on and I care about helping the people who have moved onto that rung become competent and confident.
I also refuse to be forced into a mold that I don’t fit into. Everyone who moves up the next rung seems to end up stuck in endless, mostly useless and ineffective, meetings that gain no ground. They live on their computers, they toe the line, and so many turn into bureaucrats.
I am working very hard to stay grounded in what brought me to this line of work.
Fish.
I am a fish biologist, with three degrees in fish biology. And if I don’t work directly with fish, then I am not a biologist, I am something that I don’t want to be.
I need to touch fish, and I need to help people do the things they need to do to make better fish. I need to be able to talk to people working with fish and help them understand their fish better, so they can keep their fish healthy. And I need to be able to help people learn and grow so that they can help others repeat the cycle.
That is fulfilling to me.
Being stuck in an office on a computer.
Not so much.
So when one of my team poked at me yesterday and said they were headed into the field today, and that I should come too….I waffled, looked at my calendar, cancelled a couple of things, pushed on call later, and late in the day….decided to step away from the desk and reconnect.
I can make the choice to be a better version of version of this rung that represents staying true to myself and brings me a bit of joy and satisfaction.
Out to Allouette River this morning for a chum egg take, then to McKay Creek in my backyard (so to speak) to fertilize the eggs and put them into incubation, and it was a very good day.
With death, comes new life.
Step 1. Sleep aids
Step 2. The Maternity Ward
Step 3. Speed dating 1:1
Step 4. Future baby salmon
And if that seems brutal…..well…there is always the alternative….
Oh, and this guy?
He was a pussycat.
Well, not to the fish I suppose.
He was a very healthy, very large black bear. He also didn’t give a shit that we were 50 feet away spawning salmon because he had more than enough fish to catch and eat himself. When he first showed up we all stopped working to watching his antics.
Eventually we went back to work, occasionally glancing over at him to see what he was up to. After a while I completely forgot about him and when I looked again, an hour later, he’d apparently had his fill and moved on.
He was a well behaved bear.
Not all of them are.