Moving on through the decade from 2010 to 2019, things didn’t slow down and the rollercoaster kept rolling.
2015
The renovations were completed finally, and we got our dream kitchen. Kirk opened up a vent in the pantry and found an old newspaper that someone used to insulate it from the cold; it was dated 1959. It had been there a very long time 🙂 We enjoyed the theatre, worked on the garden, enjoyed the sun when it came out, and appreciated our home. We rode the motorcycles, and explored more of our city, from the top of the mountains down to the oceanfront. Protestors locked down my office, literally…chaining the doors shut for awhile… and shut down the block. I taught my last VHF radio course. I took a three day helicopter training course in which the instructors strapped us in a frame and tried, very hard, to drown us in a pool. We tried running, and hurt ourselves. So we bought new hybrid bicycles instead. The fires were terrible and smoked most of the province in. The fires in the interior were so massive that Vancouver was blanketed in smoke for the first time in my memory. We did a bit of kayaking, played yard games, and went to a few movies. We rode dirt bikes up in Squamish and discovered that it’s much harder than it looks! My annual visit to Bella Coola was fabulous, but yet again I couldn’t fly out and had to do the Hill. In October my world was again rocked; Dad died. His battle with Alzheimer’s finally ended and he was at peace. The rest of the year felt like a bit of a blur. Loki was diagnosed as having “something” life threatening and which was destroying his red blood cells, but no one could figure out what. And so began a three year management regime with monthly vet visits. Windstorms knocked power out and trees down, I went to Portland in early December for a conference and visited Voodoo donuts and the mecca of all bibliophiles…. Powell’s Books. A week later I found myself in Bella Bella teaching a fish health course in a church. That seemed fabulously ironic…teaching science, the topic that teaches us to question, in the house that teaches people to never question. And to round out the final days of the year, a root canal and some walks on cold and sunny beaches.
2016
2016 started off in a fog…literally. Vancouver was under an inversion and if one wanted to see the sun, up a mountain you had to go. So we did 🙂 Death arrived again; Kirk’s step brother was killed in a head-on collision, so another visit to Prince George for another sad event. April took us to Jamaica to see if we would like the luxury of an all-inclusive…..we didn’t, not really. We had a good time, but the structure, the glitz and gloss, the feeling of hiding behind a locked gate and the lack of freedom to do what we wanted when and where we wanted just wasn’t for us, it was too predictable. We paid off the mortgage and felt free again. We had an upheaval in Kirk’s work situation and decided to have a staycation that summer. We explored things about our city that we hadn’t done in years, like the Pride Parade, and our Prime Minister was in the thick of it. We found free tours that were offered of the Public Library (did you know you can check out a musical instrument or tickets to many events?) and the Orpheum Theatre. Although we’ve attended dozens of shows there over the years, this was a behind the scenes, in the basement, and up in the attic tour; it was a very cool place to explore. We played pool, rode the motorcycles, and had picnics up at the top of Grouse Mountain. We took in the Harmony Festival, walked on the beach, went to the driving range, and hung out at the PNE. Fall arrived and so did field season, and so too did Kirk’s new job. We rode our bicycles, explored the docks, bought shrimp off the boats, and paid our respects. We had to remove two monolithic trees from our yard, a heartbreaking thing to do, but they were dying and presented a high risk in storms. A conference in early December down in Washington, the Christmas Market, and a white Christmas in Cranbrook to round out the year. 2016 wasn’t dull.
2017
The New Year arrived cold and white and the snow stuck around for a very long time. We took advantage of it by getting out on the local hills for snowshoeing, the first time we’d done so since moving here so long ago. We took in Sailpast at our Yacht Club, on a friend’s boat, and enjoyed the brisk but sunny weather on the water. We made trips up to Whistler to enjoy our local surroundings. Friends showed up to surprise me for my 50th birthday, and stayed for a week. It was wonderful, and we escaped from an escape room. We discovered that we had native pigeons in our trees, and invested a stupid amount of money in a bird feeder…and it’s been worth every penny to see what else we can attract. Flickers, jays, thrushes, finches, several species of woodpeckers, even a pileated once in awhile. We took the little kayaks to Whistler and paddled the River of Golden Dreams. Loki endured a sore that wouldn’t heal and had to be collared, poor little guy, but he took it (mostly) in stride. We tried paddleboarding…and were hooked. We explored the bird reserve and hiked the canyon, and appreciated the seashore. I visited Victoria for a conference and had a mini reunion with a number of former labmates and our supervisor from my graduate days. Canada celebrated her 150th birthday, and I went to Bella Coola in the summer in an attempt to fly out instead of leave on a bus. That didn’t work because the Valley was smoked in from the fires up on the plateau, again. We all inhaled smoke for a couple of months, everywhere across the province, and satellite imagery showed that the smoke from the forest fires reached all the way to Thunder Bay. When the skies finally cleared, we put the truck in 4-wheel drive and drove the Highline Road, exploring some backroads we’d never been on and finally seeing what was on that road across the Fraser that I’d seen my whole life, from the other side. It was breathtaking. We bought paddleboards. And we explored little lakes that we’d not been to before. Field season arrived, fish were caught, a very old open burial site was shared, we started swimming. I finally got my job…permanently. No more 30 day letters. No more worrying that all of this might end with someone else being handed my job, even though they might know nothing about how to do it. We lost a friend and went to a Celebration of Life in Gibsons. We rounded out the year with Christmas at home and a New Year’s Eve walk up on Grouse Mountain.
2018
2018 started with my annual photo of an out of season cherry blossom on a local tree, then it was off to Terrace to give a fish health course during the snowiest week they’d seen in years. I was almost trapped there as the airport was repeatedly closed and flights cancelled, but nature gave me a break and let me out on the day I was scheduled so that I could get home, sleep a few hours, and board a place to Amsterdam. Kirk had a trade show to work there, and I went along and spent a wonderful week exploring the city and 14 of its 75+ museums at a time of year when the lineups didn’t exist; one of my favourites was the microbe museum 🙂 We came back to more winter, but the snow was better than the rain. We listened to amazing speakers at TEDx Stanley Park and rode the motorcycles a little less than we’d have liked to. In April Milo had an emergency hernia surgery. He recovered exceptionally well, but three months later something was wrong and we discovered that he was ravaged with cancer in his pancreas, his liver, and his lungs. We were devastated to say goodbye to our little brown bear. Three months later Loki lost his battle with whatever was destroying his red cells; he crashed too far to return from, and we had to say goodbye to him as well. The heartbreak was overwhelming and, for the first time in my life, I said I couldn’t have cats again, there has been too much loss this decade, and I can’t intentionally face more. We paddled Lillooet Lake, and other places, and tried to distract ourselves from the sadness at home. Later in the year, Gizmo had what could only be described as a mini stroke and we thought we were going to lose him too. We didn’t, and heart medications are now a twice daily event. The smoke rolled in again, the PNE got some sunny days, the Cyndi Lauper concert was great, and we made a tactical error in trying out the deep fried Kit Kat. The fall field season came around and I drank in the wet coast. We paid our respects, revisited Chinatown, and wandered the area around Squamish. We snowshoed the north shore mountains and we were glad to say goodbye to a heartbreaking year.
2019
The last year of the decade rolled in and we enjoyed the presence of another wintry winter instead of the normal pervasive grey and rain that Vancouver is known for. We snowshoed to the top of Hollyburn Mountain; the views from the North Shore mountains, on a sunny day, are breathtaking and remind us why we love living here on the edge of the Pacific. 2019 was the year of the protest and, although we had nothing here to compare with what is going on in Hong Kong, gentler protests were visible. Owing to the gift of a Montblanc pen from Kirk at Christmas and a humourously titled notebook from a work colleague, I picked up the pen and started to journal on paper again. Paper is a safer place to vent about things that get under one’s skin 😉 Writing also rekindled my love of the fountain pen, and I discovered some fabulous Japanese inks. The Vancouver Pen Shop is far too close to my office. We sat down with a financial planner and asked what our future looked like and when could we think about retirement, noting that I didn’t really want to retire for another ten years. After reviewing our financial situation it was shocking to discover that Kirk could retire this year and, if I wanted, I could comfortably retire in three years. I was discombobulated to learn that; given my long history as a student, the years of contract self employment, and not deciding what I wanted to be when I grew up until I was in my forties…I thought I’d never be able to retire. That was a lot to think about. I did a few unusual field trips – Great Central Lake to visit an aquaculture operation, Sakinaw Lake for a smolt release of an endangered stock of sockeye, the first release of fish into the Elaho, now open after 50 years of being blocked by boulders resulting from roadbuilding, and Comox Lake for a coho release – and we got out on the water with friends for Sailpast. The bikes were ridden and the three+ year construction nightmare across the street finally ended and peace returned to the neighbourhood. We paddleboarded, chased a golf ball around Murdo Frazer, and rode the motorcycles up and down the Sunshine Coast after the fires derailed a friend’s schedule and derailed our plans to join him for a leg of his trip. My sister-in-law came to visit and we all went to find my nephew, it wasn’t pretty. We built a water feature in the yard, collected rock in the Upper Squamish, and broke ourselves slightly in the process. My best friend came to visit and we hiked Granite Rock and Hollyburn Mountain, we wandered Fort Langley and spent hours in antique shops; we laughed and we cried over lost pets we’d loved. The PNE came and went, and we were smarter about what we ingested there this year – the BBQ was phenomenal. I rescued a warbler. Bella Coola had more grizzlies than made for comfortable work on the river, a creek walk up the Saloompt was a magical experience. I love that place. I unexpectedly escorted gametes, by helicopter, from the Burman to Conuma River, so my helicopter training wasn’t a waste.
I worked too much, got too frustrated, and somewhere in the early fall I endured what has turned into chronic pain across my ribs. I started to visit a chiropractor again. I thought long and hard about quitting the job I fought so long and hard for. I came within a hair’s breadth of tendering my resignation; a co-worker talked me down from the ledge, for now. That was a terrible place to find myself after, only a few months earlier, telling a financial planner that I wanted to continue my work for another ten years because I loved it so much. It was a long way to fall in a few short months. I felt stress that I hadn’t felt since finishing grad school. Lack of effective leadership, cronyism, and dysfunctional team dynamics involving some toxic personalities almost drove me out….I’m still not entirely sure what might happen next and there has been a lot of soul searching about leaving Vancouver and moving to the Island to fully subscribe myself to South Coast operations; I never thought I’d start to feel more at home in a place I swore I’d never live, a place that left me so broken and in deep depression 15 years ago. But suddenly, with all that was (and wasn’t) happening, it felt more like home than home did.
We visited Britannia Mines….that only took 32 years to see. How is it that we yearn to see far away places when we have so much wonder in our own backyards. A massive slide blocked most salmon passage on the Fraser and many of us were involved in trying to find solutions, mitigative measures, rescue operations, and contingency plans. It was exhausting on everyone. We paid our respects, went to the theatre, saw some movies in comfort (the new VIP theatre is expensive, but oh so much more enjoyable and relaxing), took some walks, and appreciated each others’ presence. I started to make a more concerted effort to relax and read some books for pleasure; it’s been too long. We both got glasses; I’ve needed them forever and have been getting by with readers for too long. It’s a new world full of clarity again. Reading is less of a struggle. We spent Christmas quietly together, and will say goodbye to this decade the same way. So at the end of this decade I feel a bit worn out, a bit melancholy, but also a bit hopeful.
There are many memories I’ve missed, those are the ones that the photographs I scanned back through have twigged, wonderful, good, bad, and terrible. I laughed as I wrote, and I cried as I remembered. It’s been a long decade.
The next 10 years
What comes next is anyone’s guess. I don’t make resolutions but, with a new camera in hand, I hope to look through the lens more this coming year than I did in the past. I used to take my time when I travelled, pulling over to collect images. Now I just seem to bolt and rush to a ferry, passing places I know I love but telling myself I don’t have time. I need to fix that problem. I’m chewing on doing another 365 but, if I do, I will try to do it with kindness to myself and forgive myself if I miss a day here and there. I want to write more…for myself. Some people are leaving and I’m going to miss them. A couple of impending retirements, another leaving the program, someone already on extended leave, and another leaving soon for a year. All people who keep me grounded and sane, I’m not sure how I’m going to cope with their departures. Kirk has enrolled us in Tai Chi, I miss the martial arts and hope to enjoy this softer and more meditative form. Maybe it will help me loosen up a constantly stressed back and the pain that comes with it. Gizmo is still with us and hasn’t slowed down as much as we thought he would, he’s very, very old for his species, but he doesn’t seem to know that. We are going to visit the West Coast for a few days and relax in a cabin on the beach; I’m hoping that will reset my compass.
Wishing everyone a wonderful New Year; may the next decade be full of health and happiness.
“No good sittin’ worryin’ abou’ it. What’s comin’ will come, an’ we’ll meet it when it does.”
~ Hagrid